Tuesday, July 8, 2014

Who Is Karma Paying Back?

Recently I wrote a post about Karma, how Karma Bites and Protects. The post was meant as a form of gratitude to Karma, thanking her for her payback to an evil bank.

In 2009, five years after the evil bank, life sort of fell apart even further for my husband and I. We had to close our second business, we were flat broke, the economy was in the tank and we couldn't find jobs, and we were almost homeless.

Our son and daughter-in-law graciously offered to let us live with them. It swelled my heart with joy and pride that they did, but I refused. They were newly married, we had absolutely no money and no prospects on how to earn money. I could not bear to become a burden to them. Instead we elected to stay where we were and try to make it work, for their sakes and for our own sanity and sense of worth.

Luckily, we have a wonderful, patient and generous landlord, who worked with us. We live in a great community who helped in any way they could, some how it worked out and it still working out.

We aren't out of the woods yet, but the future, at least the present future, doesn't look as bleak and devastating as it did five  years ago. We have settled into a quiet life, we work hard to make ends meet, and the stress and drama have settled down. That is - until now.

My sister, recently divorced and on disability, is in the same situation we were in five years ago. She is moving here and has no where to go. And, guess what she wants? That's right, to stay with us. It could be for a week, it could be longer. Housing is in short supply, low income housing is up to two years, and finding something affordable is almost impossible.

I am sick with conflict - I want to help, but I do not want her or anyone else living with us right now. It would disrupt our flow, our peace, it will bring stress and conflict.  Yet, how do I not help?

It was this morning that hit me, is karma stepping in? Am I suppose to help her, like others helped us? Is Karma paying me back for calling her a bitch? I meant it in a good way when I called her that, it was a compliment, it wasn't meant to offend. If Karma really wants to payback someone, find her a nice little place of her own where she can move on with life, recover, and learn about herself.

I think Karma is paying someone back, I'm just not sure who?  It most definitely is not me.

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